


Home away from  Home

by MochiCuddles



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, Bang Chan is Whipped, Childhood Friends, Coming Out, Developing Relationship, Fluff, Gay, Homophobia, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Lee Felix (Stray Kids) is Whipped, Light Angst, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, Soft Lee Felix (Stray Kids), Soft Seo Changbin, felix gets pretty lonely for a bit, its fluffy i promise, they were born on like the same day
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24898165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MochiCuddles/pseuds/MochiCuddles
Summary: Lee Felix and Bang Chan, two boys born on the same day. Two new lights - bright, rising stars in the night sky.They were raised together, always by one another. It was by some twist of fate that their destinies intertwined. Where one went, the other eventually followed. However far the distance, they always found one another. It was the one thing they could be sure of - each other.When they're all grown up, and Chan starts taking interest in another, Felix is left a little lonely. Until he meets Seo Changbin, his other next-door neighbour. The brooding, kind of miserable but plays it off with weird jokes that are pretty hard to understand but Felix somehow does male, who he finds himself... falling for? Felix doesn't even know himself, but he's bound to find out. He's left with a new friend, and the curious question of whether or not Chan would ever find him again.He missed him, after all.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Hwang Hyunjin/Yang Jeongin | I.N, Lee Felix/Seo Changbin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 23





	1. Growing Up

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is one of the first fanfics I've wrote since I've started getting into Stray Kids more.. so uh, don't expect me to maybe know everything about them? Though, I had the inspiration so hey ho I'm doing it! I hope you enjoy! Maybe expect updates every... week or so? If I can get around to writing them.

On the 15th December, 2001, two bright lights filled the sky. Two new stars - not falling, but rising. With it came a soft promise, whispers of a bond that would link the two stars forever and always. A silent vow that one would always have the other. 

This is all metaphorical, of course. What it really means, is that in the evening; or, to be exact - 19:03 and 19:09 at night - two boys were born. In the same hospital, only a few rooms down from each other. 

Bang Christopher Chan and Lee Felix. Quite cute babies, and fawned over almost immediately. Though what struck the nurses most of all was the similar timing in which the two were born. It wasn’t entirely unusual, but it wasn’t common either. Not in the same hospital, that is.

In fact, it became such an occasion that the parents of said children were introduced to each other only a few days later. With the newborns resting peacefully away - that is, if resting meant crying and peacefully meant loudly.

Even so, the friendship was instant. The boys, however young and undeveloped, took to each other immediately. A staring competition then ensued, which lasted approximately two seconds before they broke eye contact and started bawling again.

\---

It was decided between their parents that it would be nice to have some sort of contact. Even just to support one another through the wonderful yet terrifying obstacle that was the firstborn child. So, every now and again throughout the first year they would visit one another. Be it a picnic, or simply so the mothers could gossip between one another, the two babies got to know each other. As much as two babies could. Over time, it became more usual - from once in a month, to twice, to once every week. Then, to the almost daily meetings that the two kids ended up having. They just fit, even then. They were easier to handle together than separately - quieter, somehow more relaxed in each other’s space - and, if it warmed the parent’s hearts to imagine how the two would bond as they grew up, nobody mentioned it. 

Even though at this age they couldn’t really communicate, or walk about, they spent time scooting and shuffling towards one another, playing with whatever was around. Be it a tiny wooden stool placed there in the corner for the sole reason of them NOT playing with it, the toy cars they were offered by their parents, or some random piece of furniture they decided they wanted to stare at for an hour or so. There was nothing really fulfilling about it - but hey, they were kids, and even the littlest things were both hilarious and enjoyable to them.

\---

Chan was the first to talk. Almost directly on the dot when he was officially a year old. What was his first word, you ask? Dada? Mama? Not at all. During one of their play-dates, a small cone-shaped birthday hat strapped onto the small baby Chan’s head, he was preoccupied smashing his toy cars into Felix’s own when a soft bubble of laughter erupted from him. He looked up to the other, his best friend - a gummy smile coming to his lips. Then, in the moment, out came his first word. 

‘F...Fewix!’

Safe to say, both parents had been absolutely stunned - and more than a little emotional. Something about it just felt so heartwarming. Felix got his own first word a short month after, though if you’re hoping it was Chan…

You’re very much correct! No, just kidding. Or am I? Yeah. Wait, no. Eh… It’d be cute, but also probably a little over the top if that were the case. Ah, screw it.

They were watching some kids show that neither knew the name of whilst being fed, two sets of little eyes stuck to the TV screen hung on the wall. From the corner of the screen, both kids watched as a Koala started walking across the screen, conversing with a giraffe. Felix started giggling, loudly, accidentally batting the spoon away and covering his mother with broccoli coloured mush. She groaned to herself, and started cleaning up whilst Chan’s mother smiled apologetically and got up to help her. Felix, in the meantime, pointed a finger to the Koala, and then yanked his arm around, jabbing the small digit towards Chan. As if he was trying to convey a message. Comparing them.

“Chan! Chan!” He suddenly chanted, both heads whipping up towards him. Chan seemed more than happy, and started babbling his name in retaliation. This started an all out war of babbles between the two kids, but even with a baby food covered t-shirt and a stained carpet, the two mothers couldn’t help but just smile.

\---

Fast-forwarding quite a bit, the two babies were a little older now. Not babies anymore, more on the later end of being a toddler. Three and a half-ish and both were flourishing. They’d taken to speaking quite well, and walking too. They both loved to run, which was both encouraged but despised. For kids they were bloody quick on their feet. It wasn’t rare for the duo to perform some silly prank of hiding from their parents, only to run off as fast as their little legs could carry them when they were eventually found. 

You might think it a little weird that they were around each other so much, but both families were pretty stable in terms of money - at least for now - so the days were rather boring, sitting there alone. Nearly four years in and they alternated, mostly. Every other day was a sleepover, and it was basically common at this point to find the two kids clinging to each other when they’d fallen asleep watching some movie.

A particularly fond memory from the duo’s younger years was a very special trip out to the park. It was early August, and snowing quite heavily. Oh - to add a little more context - they LOVE snow. Like, adore it. Winter is their favourite time. Even though it wasn’t really winter at this point, just one of those random bursts of freezing weather where it snows for like a day and then it all melts. The playground near their houses was coated with a tremendously thick layer of snow, more cascading down from the sky in time with the soft pitter-patter of feet hitting the already thick piles of settled powder. Thick coats covered the young kids, along with hats that would protect their ears from the chill of snow. They ran up to the slide, first. It was quite a wide slide, pretty new in comparison to a lot of the other stuff in the area. With a little help from the parents, they managed to both get sat up on the top. Felix got there first, and hit his heels back against the metal ramp happily while waiting for Chan. They interlocked hands, sliding down through the snow and into a large clump of it at the bottom, almost disappearing. Both giggled away, basically snowed in so only their heads popped out, and the small ditch in which their hands had pulled through together.

It took the parents about five minutes to bat all this snow away, enough that they could get up. This entire time, the duo had just been laughing away at the silliest things. A little snow had landed on Felix’s nose, causing the younger to sneeze loudly a few times, going cross-eyed to look at it. 

Adventuring around some more, they eventually found the swings, barely usable due to the sheer amount of snow that formed a wall around it. Of course, being driven by childish excitement, they barged through said wall and both hopped onto a seat. They gripped tightly onto the chains, legs swinging as they went, pushed by their respective mother. Higher and higher. Until Chan promptly slipped from his seat and went head-first into a bundle of snow.

He wasn’t hurt - not much, anyways - though the deep bruise on his chin would say differently. Chan’s mother took him to the hospital, just to get him checked out. Felix didn’t like that, not one bit. He was crying the whole way home. Even though he eventually got off to sleep, tired from his tears, he didn’t properly calm down until the next morning when he saw Chan again. His best friend was okay, is something that clicked into his head, while he sipped his juice and clutched the other’s hand tight as they watched a program. That settled him more than any words and pleads could have.

Over the next few weeks the bruise faded and the two fell back into their usual routine. Though, it sparked a little worry in the hearts of their parents. 

What if, one day, they were forced apart? 

As lovely, and true, as their friendship was - the likelihood is that it wouldn’t last forever. They didn’t want to put their kids through that. Nothing was acted on, but in that moment a seed of worry was planted. One that was sure to haunt them for a long time.

\---

When they were eight, Felix’s dad found a new job. It paid better. Much better. So, after a long - long conversation about it, they decided to move. Only telling Felix basically the day before, of course, knowing how the boy would react.

They didn’t know.

His heart broke. He couldn’t understand why what was happening was happening. The thought of never seeing Chan again; never running around in the park, never holding hands as they screamed on the swings and soared into the air, never watching all the new movies with popcorn spilling all over them when they laughed at some stupid joke the kiddy film made. It scared him.

However young he was, the idea of being alone was one he’d never even thought about. It had never - not once - even briefly swam across his mind.

So he sobbed. And he cried, and pleaded, and babbled like he was a baby all over again that he didn’t know what to do. They tried to calm him down, offered phone calls and video calls and visits but nothing could do it. He just wanted to be close to his best friend. His brother.

It broke his mother’s heart, to see him like that. The seed of worry that had been planted all those years ago was blossoming into a rose of realization, the petals striking out vehemently at her heart. 

“I don’t want to leave here! This is… home! Not fair!” The boy had yelled at his parents, hitting the ground with a clenched fist in between his cries. His mother’s arms tight around him, her own tears falling as she ran a hand through his hair. 

“I know, dove. I know. But this will be better for us. We can get you a great school! And you’ll meet lots of other kids, just as lovely as Ch-” She was cut off by Felix wrenching himself from her arms, and standing up. His eyes were filled with emotion and he stared at her with his fists clenched, expression continuously changing as he tried to stop the tears, his eyes puffy and face wet from the tracks. 

“I don’t want other friends! Just want… C-Chan.” His voice wavered as he finished his first sentence, and then he broke down even harder upon finishing his words, the other’s name coming out like a broken syllable on his lips. “He’s my best friend.”

Chan’s reaction had been similar, albeit less sad and more volatile. He’d always been the… how to put it, protective one of the two? Even though they were quite reckless together, Chan always had Felix’s own safety above anything else. He wasn’t just sad. He was worried, angry, anxious. 

The idea of not having Felix there left a pit in his chest. Such a deep one, that his hands came to his chest as he cried, as if he was trying to cover over it. That day was one of the worst.

But, of course, the move went through. Felix’s father was more… harsh, in his methods. Not real care for his son’s attachment, more the wellbeing of the family. He cared about them all, over the individual feelings of his child. Not that it was inherently a bad thing… more, a different mindset.

Felix had cried himself to sleep that morning, after saying goodbye to Chan one more time. That hug had been their tightest. The boys clung to one another, whilst the parents looked away as to not break their hearts even more. The sobs were the worst things, along with the fact neither would let go. At all. They had to be torn away from one another. An hour into the journey and Felix drifted off to sleep from the emotional stress of it all.

It’s not like where they were moving was bad. The house was great, actually. But it was away from Chan… that was the issue. 

Not for long though, right?

Two days into living in their new house. Two days of Felix never leaving his room, not participating in anything his parents tried to make him do, hardly eating. He was aggressive, and distracted, and sad. They were all surprised by the moving vans that suddenly parked up in the house next to their own. A few minutes later in that morning, probably just after eight, and a familiar car parked up on the path outside. Felix was still in his room, so of course he missed it - but what he did hear, was the loudest banging on the door outside. Almost enough to knock the thing off its hinges.

Felix didn’t see what happened next, but he heard it. His dad, first.

“Woah woah woah! Calm down, what is it you ne-” He was cut off by the sound of the door creaking open, and charging footsteps, his dad’s back hitting the wall. Then a scream - a yell, a deep guttural bellow.

“FELIX!! Fe!! Lix!!” Came Chan’s unmistakable voice, and his young heart wove itself together again, the pieces melding into one beating heart of pure adoration. He charged out of his room and as the handle shifted downwards and the door clicked open, he saw him.

Chan. Tears already formed in his eyes, but the brightest smile on his lips. Their eyes met, and the pure excitement radiating off both of them filled the room. It made their mothers laugh, the parents collected near the doorway. The two kids charged at one another, meeting in the middle in another tight hug. Chan’s arms around Felix’s sides and Felix’s around his neck, openly sobbing into his neck.

“Chan! You’re here! I missed you so m-much! P-Please never leave again.” He cried, and Chan laughed through his tears of joy, grinning at him devilishly.

“Try and make me, Lix.” He teased.

By the door, the mothers were whispering to one another. ‘How the hell is it you’re here…? I thought you were staying in town?’

Chan’s mother smiled, replying slowly. ‘We were. Then we got a job offer for the local office here, to take over as manager. This was the best property, too. I thought it’d be a lovely surprise for the boys, don’t you think? If you can put up with me and Chan for a little longer, dear?” She sent Felix’s mother a smile, and the smile was reciprocated. They hugged, tightly. Even they had a bond, just like their kids. It was a sweet friendship, they raised their kids together probably more than their husbands helped them. To the point where both boys sometimes called the other ‘Mum’ too, when they were particularly tired or excited.

They were just happy. Happy to be back together again, hand in hand. They were family, after all.


	2. Growing Up - Even Older

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lee Felix and Bang Chan, two boys born on the same day. Two new lights - bright, rising stars in the night sky.
> 
> They were raised together, always by one another. It was by some twist of fate that their destinies intertwined. Where one went, the other eventually followed. However far the distance, they always found one another. It was the one thing they could be sure of - each other.
> 
> When they're all grown up, and Chan starts taking interest in another, Felix is left a little lonely. Until he meets Seo Changbin, his other next-door neighbour. The brooding, kind of miserable but plays it off with weird jokes that are pretty hard to understand but Felix somehow does male, who he finds himself... falling for? Felix doesn't even know himself, but he's bound to find out. He's left with a new friend, and the curious question of whether or not Chan would ever find him again.
> 
> He missed him, after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I KNOW I said it'd probably take a week but I ended up doing quite a bit of writing and eh... here we are?
> 
> Second chapter, woo-hoo!
> 
> Now... uhh, I'm not exactly sure of what ship to do on this? Like, I was going to have it be a Changlix, but now suddenly writing it I have the urge to perhaps end it with Chanlix? Not that Changlix won't be in it, just that in the END, it will eventually be Chanlix. Thoughts? 
> 
> The next chapter is the start of the actual fic, by the way! This is all backstory, so y'all know what's up when it properly begins.

“You alright there, Lix?” A soft voice inquired. A pair of brown eyes settled on the younger boy’s figure, legs outstretched and pointing towards the ceiling, heels settled on the wall. His head was hanging off the edge of the bed, his hair falling down an extra few inches and nearly hitting the floor. It wasn’t a particularly high bed, but comfortable - he’d slept in it many times, though it wasn’t his. A book laid forgotten on the crinkled sheets next to him, a pen between his fingers that he twirled about. After a few moments of quiet, he settled with it, only now absently tapping his lower lip with its edge.

Chan was smiling at him, with those knowing eyes of his as the boy totally blanked him. His eyes were distant, clouded over with the fog of thoughts that he usually found himself lost in, daydream after daydream. A flick to the forehead cleared that up, as Felix’s legs shot to the side and he whined dramatically in pain, rolling about on the bed for a moment before collapsing onto his front, tongue hanging out of his mouth and his eyes closed. He held his breath, pretending to be dead, and Chan gasped.

“Oh no! Lix! What did I do?!” The fifteen-year-old rushed over from his position on the office chair at the side of the bed, and jumped onto the bed next to him. Literally, jumped. The bed creaked loudly at the action, and Felix almost fell off from the way it resounded, squeaking ini surprise but then maintaining his original position. Chan started chest compressions, very dramatic movements forming almost a comical way of him basically pushing down quite hard into Felix’s chest. The younger laughed, loudly at this, the tone deep and genuine. His eyes shone with amusement, knocked out of whatever weird thoughts had been circulating in his head. Chan smiled at him then, and sat cross-legged, looking down at him.

Felix shimmied himself up the bed, and gently laid back, his head resting on Chan’s knee. The elder - by six minutes (he mentioned it a lot in arguments) - let his hand fall to Felix’s brown locks, fingers curling a little to card through with ease. Felix softened, his freckles shining as the sunlight hit his face through the window, looking out into the busy city around them.

“I had a question,” Felix mused, after a few moments of quiet silence. His voice was soft, so it didn’t disrupt much and he received only a low hum of confirmation from the elder, whose head was resting back against the headboard of the bed.

Felix seemed to think. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again. Not sure how to… word it, perhaps? He knew what he wanted to say - he did - but it was hard to word. He didn’t know how to say it.

“What happens if… if I have to leave again?” His voice got quieter as he spoke, and the final word came out with a slight break in his tone. He furrowed his brows, and watched Chan’s expression. His face didn’t change, but understanding shone in his eyes. His question was met with a long silence, until finally Chan took a breath.

“I follow.” He stated simply, and met Felix’s eyes, offering a smile.

“You… you’ll follow me?” Felix responded, echoing what Chan had said. His lips parted, and then he smiled, reaching up to tangle one of his hands lazily in Chan’s hair, thumb running over his cheek.

“Course’. What would I do without you around to keep me on track, Lixie?” He raised an eyebrow like it was obvious. “We’re forever, you and me. Got that? No matter how far the distance. Though, gotta say, I do hope it isn’t too far… my legs can get super stiff after a while.” He mused, pulling a bright laugh from the sunshine laying in his lap.

“But you’d run for me, yeah? That’s cute.” He cupped Chan’s cheeks with his palms, and squished his face together, snickering at the expression that appeared. “We should be studying…”

“We should be.” Chan nodded in confirmation, and shifted to start getting up, pausing at the whine it pulled from Felix.

“But I’m tired, Channie… so, let's make a deal! Cuddle with me a bit longer, and I’ll study super hard.” He winked, trying to sway him, but the elder simply stared at him, trying to look unimpressed but there was a smile in his eyes.

“Counter-offer, you study now and we can cuddle afterwards. I’ll even throw in a hot chocolate - if, and only if, you get at least a few pages done.” The groan that came from Felix at his words could only be described as loud and irritating to the ears, but then he smiled and nodded, it having clicked in his mind that he would get a nice hot drink and time with Chan if he did well. He got up, stretching out as he was a little stiff from laying down, and walked over to the small wooden desk that sat at one side of the room, up against the back wall.

“What do we start with? Bio? Chem? Math?” He shuddered.

“Biology? That’s what you need most, I think.”

With a grumble, Felix pulled out his books and twirled the pen around his fingertips again, now holding it correctly. Chan set up his speakers, putting on some relaxing ambient music to at least try to keep Felix concentrated as he pushed himself up, grabbing the discarded book and opening it up to read.

Comfortably, the rest of the day passed without much happening. Felix obliged, and got a good chunk of his homework done, complaining about the fact Chan didn’t have any, to which the elder simply informed him that he’d done it already. Fulfilling his promise, Chan made him a hot chocolate, and the two cuddled up in his room with their drinks, watching a movie on his laptop, each with an earphone in. Mid-way through, empty mugs now on the desk, Felix ended up falling asleep. Chan knew it was happening, when the younger’s head slowly dropped, until it hit his shoulder and soft breaths tickled his arm. He smiled, pulling the blanket up more to cover Felix and mumbling a goodnight. It was already late, so no harm in letting him go to sleep. Plus, they’d planned a sleepover anyway. His mother was out late at work, but when she got back she found the two sleeping away, the laptop nearly falling off the bed though she narrowly managed to catch it. Turning the light off, she left the two teens to themselves, shaking her head softly, as a sad simple made its way to her lips. 

Downstairs, she eventually sat at the kitchen table, in front of her a small envelope. Unfolding it, she pulled out a letter and started to read, her expression faltering as she did so. A few moments of silence passed as she finished, the only noise being the soft tick of the clock on the wall and the ruffle of curtains as wind flowed serenely through the windows and ruffled them. She set the letter down, bringing a hand up and massaging her forehead, a few tears falling.

It would just be a repeat of the last time. She didn’t want him to hurt like that again. She just wished she had a choice.

-

“Your dad is ill, love.”

Chan’s face fell, his hands tight on the table as his heart dropped down into his feet. He swallowed down the sudden lump in his throat, trying to control his breathing but his throat had closed up a little. 

“Ill? Ill how? Is he okay? Where is he? Can we go see him?”

In his life, Chan had seen a lot of things from his Mother. They were as close as could be. But he had never seen her break down. Not until now, as if her heart was falling into pieces. She wasn’t just crying, she was breaking in front of him, into little shards of sorrow that he couldn’t put back together again. She couldn’t find her voice, lost in the sobs that caught in her throat. A hand came over her eyes, as if to shield her vulnerability from Chan’s gaze, but it hurt too much. She fell, her back hitting the counter but she just slid down. 

Chan rushed over, kneeling down and placing his hands on her shoulders. He looked worried, biting back the tears that built up in his eyes. He didn’t know what to do, he felt useless.

“Mum? It’s okay. I’m here. We’ll… we’ll get through this, okay? Please. We will.”

It took her a while. A long while. About fifteen minutes, to properly calm down. She looked a mess, her throat sore as she spoke.

“I got a letter the other day, from your father’s work. The company is going under, so he’s being terminated.” She paused, allowed that to sink in, then continued. “Your father collapsed in work, this morning, on his last day. They… t-they think he has some sort of… t-tumour. But they’re sending him in for more tests. He’s weak, very weak. They… they don’t… his condition...” She started crying again, unable to speak the words. But Chan knew what she meant. They weren’t sure if he would make it. Chan’s heart tore in two and he cried. They cried together, until all the tears were used up and there was nothing left but the sharp pain. 

It made perfect sense, now. His dad had been… off, lately? He’d seemed quite tired all the time, but they’d put it off to him working late, or not sleeping much. He felt sore, but they thought it to be the same reasoning. He was… slower? His reflexes were almost sluggish, but why would they have been looking out for that? He’d never mentioned anything, so they’d never looked. Preoccupied with their own lives.

-

Chan’s father passed away three days later. Some tumour that had suddenly awoke and grew at an almost inhumane pace. On his brain. Neither were sure of the specifics, as soon as the words left the doctor’s lips both could no longer hear. Their ears dulled to anything but the cries.

Felix held him through it, his mother held Chan’s. For the first time, it didn’t help. Nothing dulled the pain. No comfort, no words, no touch, no thought. All he wanted to do was scream it out, scream it out until he couldn’t anymore. Until he felt numb enough that he didn’t feel it, or anything.

Whatever it took to feel better.

But Felix wouldn’t let him. The embrace didn’t help. It didn’t soothe the pain, but it forced him to let it out. The tears flowed like a waterfall, the weight of it all crushing and heavy onto the younger’s shoulder, but he didn’t let him go. He just held him close, even when he passed out from how much he’d exerted himself, or when he woke up a few hours later and started to sob all over again.

Felix held him.

-

Chan’s mother couldn’t support them on her own, the family would soon find out. She couldn’t work as much because she needed to look after Chan, but then she had to work even more to get the money to provide for them both. In the end, it was decided that they would need to move out. To go live with Chan’s grandparents, in their - quite large - house, where money wouldn’t be an issue. 

Of course this didn’t settle well with Chan, or Felix.

Chan was barely getting through the days with Felix there, let alone without him. So he yelled, and he argued with her to the point of screaming because he disagreed. So fueled by emotion that he said things he shouldn’t have. When he found her later, crying on the floor once more, his heart took another blow.

“I’m sorry. I’m s-so, so sorry.” He’d said, collapsing onto his knees next to her and pulling her close. She needed him more than he needed her right now. He kept apologizing, but it did nothing to fill the deep pit in her chest, at the loss of her one true love. Her soulmate.

-

They left that week. The house went up for sale, and Felix watched as the days passed. They spoke over the phone, texted basically twenty-four seven. Whenever someone saw the boys, they were always conversing. But it wasn’t the same and the remainder of the time was spent up distractedly staring out of windows, or crying, or wondering what the other was doing. What life would be like.

Felix was in Australia, Chan was in Seoul. They were far apart, and it hurt. All Felix wanted was to be there for him and he couldn’t do that.

Until his own letter came.

-

Felix dances. He loves to dance, it had been a passion of his for many years and he’d attended many competitions for it. At first, he’d been quite scared and anxious, until he saw Chan in the audience. His courage would skyrocket, his movements would fill with this grace and pride, a smile would find its way to his lips and he would just soar. He would fly.

During one of these competitions, earlier into the year before Chan’s father passed away, there’d been this big competition - some showcase - and afterwards he’d been approached by a performing arts school representative. Someone from Seoul, who’d been visiting their friend and was invited to attend the showcase just to watch for his friend’s little cousin.

He, surprisingly, offered Felix a place at the school. Blown away by the boy’s talent at such a young age, he believed that it could really be a place for him. He’d put it off because of Chan, but after he’d left for Seoul himself… Felix’s mother had contacted the man again, and sorted some things out.

“They… they what?” The boy whispered, staring at the letter in his shaking hands. “Wait.. but I already said no… why would they send this?” He looked up to his parents, his voice a low whisper but with an echo of hopefulness.

“I contacted him, love.” His mother supplied, sitting down next to him. “You deserve to go to a place you’ll flourish. Your father can find a new job easy. I can find one too. But this is about you and what you deserve.” She laid a hand on his shoulder and he smiled at her the best he could muster, tears falling down his face but they were happy.

Whether he was crying about the opportunity, or the idea that he could be near Chan again…nobody asked. They knew what his answer would be already, deep inside.

-

Chan was a bit too distracted with his feelings to notice his mother’s behaviour starting to… brighten, perhaps? She smiled, a little more. Whispered to her own parents, body twitching in anticipation.

A week passed. Then, came a knock at the door.

“Chan, love, could you answer that please?” His mother called out, voice soft. Though it was getting nearer, so she was obviously approaching. Chan sighed, but got up, confirming with a soft shout and heading through the large hallway that led to the front door. What he didn’t expect when opening it up was a boy to tackle him in the chest, wearing a sweater he distinctly recognized as one of his own and crying about how much he missed him. When his mind cleared, and he could focus, it hit him.

“F...Felix?!” He yelled, grabbing onto him. He found the boy’s cheeks, almost yanking him up and finding his eyes with his own. He was instantly crying (though he’d done enough of that recently, it actually surprised him sometimes how he still had some left in him), and clinging onto him, holding him close and just being there. He didn’t really know what to think, but right now he just needed to hold him, to tell himself that this was real.

After a little while, they all sat down to talk. Felix was introduced to Chan’s grandparents, going a bit shy during the introductions but they took to him instantly. Then the boy and his parents explained the situation. Felix’s acceptance into the school, the move, his father’s new job. They’d rented a house - only just down the road from Chan’s. There was only a singular house between the two. 

There was no private time to speak that day. No secrets, or hiding away, or running. Just two boys and their families - basically one big family at this point - comforting the ones that were hurt. 

Life wasn’t good. He’d lost his dad and that would stay with him forever. But he had hope it would get better. With Felix by his side, and a large loving family to support him. 

Once again… he started to wonder, though. What was Felix, to him? A brother? Something less, something more? What was he to Felix? Would he ever be something more? Is he already? 

What happened if he found someone else, one day?


End file.
